i feel like i've been lied to yet again. this whole "let's write 50,000 words in one month" thing is driving me mad, and the one month has yet to start. i can't back out now because i've been shooting my mouth off all over town, but even though the instructional book for this month is called "no plot? no problem!" i feel that no plot is indeed a very big problem. i got nothing. you're not supposed to use old ideas for this crazy month of keyboard pounding, and who am i to disobey rules that aren't going to be monitored or enforced and were made up by some guy living in oakland who devotes a whole chapter of his book on what to eat and drink while writing your 50,000 words? methinks that, in this case, he was just trying to waste some words.

so, i tried asking my significant dude for some plot help. these are the ideas he gave me:

a boy and his fishsticks.

a boy and his fish.

a boy and his bird.

a boy and his dog.

two boys drinking cosmopolitans and they aren't gay.

a boy and his socks.

there were others. i'm blocking them out.

anyhow, now i just feel awful. i can't even think of an interesting character, except of course when i "create" that character in my own likeness, with maybe bigger boobs and a car that doesn't drift to the right when she lets go of the steering wheel to eat her soup. jeez.

in other news, i found a fingernail on my desk yesterday morning, and it wasn't mine. who the hell is clipping their nails on my desk when i'm not around? my coworker presented the idea that maybe the fingernail was attached to my dunkin' donuts coffee.... and that just gave me a real bad feeling.