Since I'm on Facebook now and can record the inane minutiae of my life almost simultaneously with the occurrences of said minutiae, I haven't felt that much of a need to blog. Entire paragraphs and blog entries have now been whittled down to one or two quick sentence fragments. And there it is- what's going on in a nutshell without having to exert any actual, typerly effort. There you go.

The thing about Facebook is that I kind of love it, kind of hate it. The instant gratification of spying on my friends is pretty great, I will admit. Oh, look, so and so just closed on a house. So and so's sister made a real kick ass pasta salad. So and so seems to have gone from "in a relationship" to "just fucking around, yo." But the hate is there, strong as ever. The same quick updates that I love, I also hate. While I certainly have my fair share of boring "Jackie is doing her taxes" type posts, I get quickly irritated by everyone else's dashed off posts. There are things I need to know and things I don't. Here is a post I just read. Names and stuff have been changed, but you'll catch the drift.

Sarah Smith had a very productive day! Cleaned up the living room, went by Melanie's apartment, shopping at Dominicks, back to Melanie's place, then built a book shelf! Now chilling at home! Tomorrow: washing the windows, cable guy, and then shopping for a futon.

Seriously. At least make your Facebook updates mildly interesting. Snorefest, yo! Add a little something something to keep my interest. I don't give a fuck about cleaning up the living room, building the book shelf, and futon shopping. Not even in the slightest! But, here's something I might care about.

Sarah Smith hates her life and will likely seduce the cable guy tomorrow just as a way to break up the day.

Now that's worthy of my time! Or how about:

Sarah Smith is building a bookshelf while wearing a blindfold and having a stiff drink.

Sarah Smith slipped on a banana peel at Dominicks.

Sarah Smith had a very productive day but still feels the urge to choke herself a little.

I don't know. So, there's the super boring posts and then there are the posts designed to make others envious of how great you are. Such as:

Sarah Smith gets hit on all the time!

Sarah Smith just got complimented on how funny she is.

Which is ironic, due to the complete lack of humor in said post, wouldn't you say?

Then, the melancholic posts designed solely to beg further poking and prodded (pointed out in a succinct, interesting little post by my pal Brian).

Sarah Smith will be okay with time.

Sarah Smith is being strong. Today's a new day.

Sarah Smith is hanging in there and wishing upon a star.

Also, we can't forget song lyrics!

Sarah Smith This is radio nowhere. Is there anyone alive out there? This is radio nowhere.

Sarah Smith Goodbye ruby Tuesday. Who could hang a name on you?

There you go. Love, then hate. Then hate. Then love. But boy is Facebook convenient. I haven't spoken to any of my friends face to face in weeks! And there's no need to! My hermit ass is in seventh heaven.

Kind of.