How does unemployment work? Do you have to get fired in order to be eligible, or can you just quit and sign up? Have I ever told you what my dream come true would be? A severance package. Like, two years paid salary plus benefits, and I get to pack up my desk and leave right now. Do severance packages generally last for about two years and include benefits? I would certainly hope so- we are talking about my dream here, after all.

The Cheese and I are planning a much needed vacation. I'm so excited, I can barely hold in my pee. I won't tell you where or when we're going until we come back (I'm afraid of people finding out I'm on my vacay and then robbing my house), but let's just say we're going somewhere awesome sometime in the next, let's just say, two years. I'll let you know how it goes. I mean, it's not a super awesome place, or anything, but it's not here, so that's a huge bonus. And we're not actually leaving the country since "exchanging currency" sounds like a monster of a disaster in both math and customer service. And it's not your typical tourist trap, which is precisely why I want to go. Anyway, I've already said too much. Giddy up, and get back to me on that unemployment thing.