facts about my sister

* born five minutes before valentine's day.

* was walking through sears one day when, boom, her knee gave out. the paramedics had to cut her jeans to set her leg, and she was certainly not happy about *that.*

* had the title of "prettiest girl in tinley park" for five years running, until, you know, our mother stopped saying it.

* first job was at the drug store. couldn't figure out how to work the lotto machine, promptly quit.

* once recieved a haircut from her older sister jackie. jackie butchered her hair and marcia- that's her name- had to wear a ponytail for eleven months.

* her name is marcia. doesn't that sound like an italian swamp?

* used to turn the radio really high, and sit in the closet, while my parents fought. i always insisted on seeing and hearing the fights. key difference.

* used to own a lot of bodysuits. remember bodysuits?

* bone straight hair which she likes to say is "wavy."

* first relationship lasted over three years. his name was mitch, and he wore ladies' jeans.

* marcia loves to buy irregular pants.

* enjoys the punk rock.

* second job was at tj maxx, where she took every opportunity to tell off people who left messes in dressing rooms.

* has inherited the money-saving gene. i don't think i'm overestimating when i say that she somehow has about $20,000 put away. that's what you get when you only buy irregular pants off the discount rack.

* loved to wash the dishes as a little girl. loved to sweep and vacuum and dust and windex. lately, her bedroom resembles a hotel room, minus the mint on the pillow.

* took a ceramics class, churned out about half a dozen kick ass vases. some of them with gambling themes.

* wants to major in accounting, but does not want to be an accountant. once said, "maybe a low level accountant" to my friend tony, who replied, "you mean a cashier?"

* her third and latest job is at the same optical i used to work at, with all the same people. a little creepy, huh?

* her glasses are always crooked.

* calls me once a week after nine p.m., when the minutes are free. starts each conversation with "'tsupitchoo?"

* is awesome. is what the hallmark cards mean when they say, "there's nobody like my sister."