i've got some balls up in the air as to my "career." i've got an interview next week outside the company, and i've got my general manager and another general manager both trying to recruit me for a higher management position within my company, at the two different locations. i'm frazzled and can't figure out what's best for me. i guess no matter what, i'm going to walk away from this making more money, unless, of course, all my balls come flying down and smack me right in the face. getting hit in the face by balls: not a good feeling.

generally speaking, of course.

i don't handle stress all that well. it's a good feeling to know that i'm being fought over within the company, but it's a better feeling to know that somebody else may want me, too. i just feel a little guilty over the whole thing. is it so wrong to explore all of my options? i'm saying yes to everyone right now, but soon i'm going to have to say no to somebody, maybe two somebodies. i feel like i'm dating two brothers and then some other guy from, like, seattle or something. one woman i work with is encouraging me to drop the balls and go back to school to be a teacher.

"you'd be a good teacher," she keeps saying. i keep imagining myself in front of a classroom saying, "fuck the reading assignment, let's all get hotdogs." it reminds me of when i briefly entertained the idea of moving to japan to teach english. at the end of my stint, you'd have a bunch of japanese people running around saying, "like, um, well, yeah." i'd also probably teach cursing, but, again, not on purpose.

in other news, chris and i have purchased airline tickets for los angeles in august. i'm quite excited, mainly because my body feels at home in the pacific time zone. what feels late central standard is just a little bit early out west, and so i'm bound to be on time to all of my engagements.

all swell always ends swell.